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I am sitting in my cubicle looking around at the other cubicles and realizing that my life is worthless. I have touched other people's lives during the course of my lifetime, but their lives are worthless too so I guess it really doesn't matter. How many people are sitting in cubicles around the world right now working on stuff that they don't care about personally? I don't know the exact figure but I know that it is a very large number. However when you take a look at the overall picture of humanity, the people sitting in cubicles doing work that doesn't matter to them is a category of humans, a classification of a group within the overall scope of the human population.

Let's face it, the human race will die out eventually. Yea it's sad and depressing and whatever but death is a fact of life, and if we don't kill ourselves then something in nature will polish us off ultimately. If you back up-way back past the earth, the solar system, the galaxy, the universe, what is past that? If there is actually intelligent life at that level then to them we are tiny microbes that infest and destroy natural resources for our own benefit. They may find our behavior interesting on the individual level, how it is manipulated by the whole to further the group, yet acts and thinks for itself. They may also categorize the types of people in the group; the revered rich and famous, the ones who rise to power, the poor and destitute, the cubicle workers, who knows how many classifications they would come up with. Either way, at that level individual names are lost and we are all known only as part of our classification or sub-group of humanity that we are seen in.

Just in case we are classified as such, I have decided to further myself from other cubicle workers by sitting in cheese. Within humanity, there is the sub-classification of cubicle workers, and within that there are the cubicle workers who sit in cheese. I am the proud pioneer of this noble sub-sub-classification of humanity and I plan to further my cause in as many ways possible in the hopes that this will add some meaning to my existence. I will sit in all types of cheese all the time, I will find a way to make cheese not smell after sitting in your chair for a few days, I will carry large amounts of cheese to and from my desk every day to ensure that I have enough cheese to sit in and be known to all as the cubicle worker who sits in cheese all day. Ah what a glorious cause, Corporate America be damned! Come on and classify me giant alien scientists, I am ready with cheese on my ass.

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